Poor Anthony Weiner. Apparently not realizing that sending dirty pictures of oneself over Twitter could possibly fall into the wrong hands. This is a U.S. Congressman. A man who’s supposed to be trusted to make laws. Someone whose life calling is telling the rest of us how we should live. And yet it never occurred to him that putting pictures of his…er…weenie…into cyberspace would have no consequences. Now that’s the kind of guy I’d want representing my district.
Getting Serious For A Moment
Rep. Weiner isn’t the first powerful man to be embroiled in this kind of scandal, and he won’t be the last. He joins an infamous club that’s already populated by a good number of other fellow weenies. It makes me wonder about the kind of people who do this sort of thing. I know that at the core, it’s our sinful natures that cause all humans to do stupid, destructive & hurtful things. To risk everything for an illicit lure. I know that cheating isn’t the exclusive realm of rich, powerful men. There are plenty of “Joe Shmoes” who do the same thing. For that matter there are plenty of “Jane Shmoes” who could join the club. But it does seem like this “rich, powerful man” class of cheaters are especially prone to this kind of mischief. I can only think that the very traits that made them rich and powerful to begin with, make them think they can get away with such behavior. Or perhaps be so caught up in their own “specialness” that they think they’re entitled to take their pleasure and never face consequences. Plus, they always seem to be surrounded by a bunch of sycophants who help cover up their dirty deeds.
Aaaaaand Back To Making Fun
Then you realize all that power, that confidence…and yes…that arrogance…doesn’t make them “that smart”. In fact, it seems to make them even dumber. Especially Anthony Weiner. Twitter? Really? The “www” tacked onto the beginning of web addresses actually means something. So no thought that the WORLD WIDE WEB is just that…world wide? No thought that the woman (correction womEn) could be media hoes who want their 15-minutes of fame? I Googled Congressman Weiner and found out he’s on the Subcommittee on Oversight & Investigations and the Subcommittee on Health. How appropriate. It was an “oversight” on his part not to know that everything posted to internet STAYS on the internet…forever. This isn’t Vegas. And there may be some real mental health problems going on if he gets his thrills from “twittering” his unmentionables to women he doesn’t know.
In looking at the Congressman’s website, I noticed an awesome double entendre called The Weiner Report. I assume it’s actually a totally serious account of what he’s been up to in Congress, but that name is…just…so…perfect! And, holy cow, can you imagine the report for the last couple weeks? Ye gads!
And that leads me to a new blog tradition. I am so amazed and stupefied by Congressman Anthony Weiner’s “duhhh” moment that I am instituting…The Weiner Awards. This special award will be bestowed at my discretion to any deserving individual (man or woman) who exhibits exceptionally stupid “duhhh” behavior…in other words Big Weenies.
The very first Weiner Award goes to the Mr. Weenie himself. I am also rewarding posthumous awards to the following…
Arnold Schwarzenegger – Infamous for impregnating his wife AND his housekeeper at the same time. Somehow he managed to hide the extra child for 10 years.
Tiger Woods – Infamous for apparently sticking his club anywhere he wanted with a variety of women. Managed to hide it for years, until the wife took a golf club to his head.
Presidential Hopeful Weenie
John Edwards – Infamous for being a giant douche by cheating on cancer-stricken wife. While running for President of the United States, no less. Had a baby with the other woman, though he firmly denied it until a DNA test confirmed that…yes…he really was a Giant Douchebag.
- Actor Weenie
Charlie Sheen – Infamous for a lifetime of destructive, asinine, wacked-out behavior, including drugs, alcohol, gross women & excess partying. Also for being generally crazy and having an ego as big as a semi.
Stay tuned for the next Weiner Award. You never know when someone will do something “duhh” enough to earn it.